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I think there's something rrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaalllllllllyyyyyyyy wrong with me.
Yesterday I was standing outside and watched like 3 different ice cream trucks drive past my house, and something occurred to me. No matter how desperate for a job I get, I could never drive an ice cream truck. For one thing, I don't like childrens, especially not enough to have herds of the little screamers banging on the side of my vehicle screeching for an "ice kweam bahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!" And then there's the music. That endless, insipid, brain-melting music. I could never stomach that. And here's the part where I realized I need to seek professional help. I suddenly started visualizing an ice cream truck driving around a neighborhood blaring not that horrifying tinkly music, but Nine Inch Nails. And then my brain came up with the verbal exchange between the driver of such a truck and some random kid:
Kid: What kinda ice kweam you gots, mithter?
Driver: BLACK
Kid: What's flavor is that?
Driver: DESPAIR!!!!!!!!!!
Kid: What's that taste like?
Driver: Kind of like black licorice, but not as sweet.
Yes, I'm a very sick man. I mean, seriously, who thinks of shit like that?
Yesterday I was standing outside and watched like 3 different ice cream trucks drive past my house, and something occurred to me. No matter how desperate for a job I get, I could never drive an ice cream truck. For one thing, I don't like childrens, especially not enough to have herds of the little screamers banging on the side of my vehicle screeching for an "ice kweam bahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!" And then there's the music. That endless, insipid, brain-melting music. I could never stomach that. And here's the part where I realized I need to seek professional help. I suddenly started visualizing an ice cream truck driving around a neighborhood blaring not that horrifying tinkly music, but Nine Inch Nails. And then my brain came up with the verbal exchange between the driver of such a truck and some random kid:
Kid: What kinda ice kweam you gots, mithter?
Driver: BLACK
Kid: What's flavor is that?
Driver: DESPAIR!!!!!!!!!!
Kid: What's that taste like?
Driver: Kind of like black licorice, but not as sweet.
Yes, I'm a very sick man. I mean, seriously, who thinks of shit like that?
